Tue. Mar 5th, 2024

1997 Ford Taurus GL  If you are like me you really enjoy watching the show Pimp My Ride on MTV.  I LOVE seeing those guys turn the biggest pieces of crap into super pimp machines.  I drive an old Ford  Taurus with 156,000 miles and think that it is a perfect candidate for a pimping.

The problem though is that it seems that they only pick people who live in California.  What is the deal with that? Us East Cost playas need some pimpin too.  I think my Taurus would look pretty hot with 20″ blades and glitter-green paint. 

OK, I’ll stop.  I really don’t want to pimp my ride I just really need to get the thing road ready.  So basically I’m whining for some help to get my car lookin nicer…or atleast collect enough money to get a decent used car to replace this beater.  Check out the nice things I have to deal with the Taurus right now:

  • Driver-side door panel is detached from the door
  • No power window motor (window doesn’t roll down)
  • Strange looking cables and wires dangle from the bottom of the car
  • Motor mounts need replaced (the engine jumps around and smacks itself off the firewall)
  • Headlight covers are soo scratched that evening visibility is about 2 feet
  • AC unit leaks…no cold air. (This in conjunction with a window that doesn’t roll down is a really fun summer time adventure
  • Trunk lid doesn’t shut all the way…trunk carpet had to be ripped out from rain (makes for a good bathtub on rainy days)
  • Windshield sprayer hose dry rotted (washer fluid sprays on windshield 50% of the time…other times inside the engine compartment

broken door panelloose brake cable scratched headlight covers chart of dodge vipers i've smoked

 So what am I asking?  All I’m asking is for the Internet marketing community to give back to the community, or atleast make a small donation to the SAVE THE TONY ROCKS FORD TAURUS fund.

What’s in it for you? Well, you’ll be rewarded with a totally awesome plug on the Tony Rocks website.  And let me tell you, the plug will be super awesome.  I receive billions of visits a day here!  Many will see your plug.  Well, maybe about 30, but still, I can always dream.

Feel free to donate any amount, 2 cents, 2000 dollars, what ever you’d like.  I’ll even post pictures of the drastic improvements made to the Taurus.  OR, if I run into enough generous people (Hey Warren Buffet, you could use a little publicity, right?) I will post a picture of a new car!

BONUS:  Donating $100 will get your domain named spray painted onto the super duper and totally famous Tony Rocks.com Honda CRX.  

So, if you are generous and you feel like helping out, please do, if not, I don’t care.  I can still kick my feet through the floor of the Taurus and shuffle myself to work.

By admin

5 thoughts on “Pimp My Taurus Donations Accepted”
  1. I have a taurus and it runs great and likes hot too but, that doesn’t mean it doesn’t need pimping I live in michigan and I think that Pimp My Ride owes us both some pimping so I think you should write protest do something to get Cali to share the pimping with the east side and stop the hate in on us east side players you now what I’m say’n

  2. is that my car? i just sold that to someone like a month ago. every problem is the same so you couldnt even use it as a parts car cause everything that is wrong with yours was wrong with mine the windows probably work try pressing in the middle of the window up and down button for instance if u want it to go down press just below the center really hard if that doesnt work just wait till winter

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