Why Hate Microsoft When You Have Google?

Yes, you ALL hate Microsoft, especially you Unix flavoured open-sourced types.  Dump IE, use Opera or Firefox.  Microsoft is Evil.  Blah blah whine whine.  I’m probably biting the hand that feeds me…wait, yes, I am biting the hand that feeds me writing this article about calling Google the new Evil.  The George W. Bush of software companies (for all of the left-sided friends of mine).

I’m ranting about Google being evil primarily because my PR has been dropped like a rhyme that was too hot for Snoop Dogg.  Yeah, you are all saying “but the datacenters are still synching up and stuf.”  Yeah yeah, whatever.  Google says that like to keep things in check and to guarantee good and relevant results to the web searching visitors. This process obviously includes ripping out sites from their index that may add to a horrible surfing experience. The type of ripped sites could be article spammed adsense sites, link farms, stuff like that.

So why is it when you type in the search term “failure” into Google that the very first listing is a link to the official website of the President of teh United States – George W. Bush? Giggle Giggle Ha Ha, I can see that you are all laughing about this now.  Obviously there is some trickery going on over at Google, effectively exhibiting their political views.

Not so says Google…in fact that have a disclaimer on the search results that says “This may seem politicaly slanted! See why this shows up.”  Clicking on that tid-bit of information will give you an awesome explanation about link bombing that causes incredible amounts of quality links that describe failure as being George W. Bush and his website.  This is someting Google has NO control over, according to them.  NO Control?!  Give me a break.  They spend millions on hiring surf nerds to de-list my website, drop my pr-ranking, and even ban legitimate website from using Adsense.

I’m not fuming over them because they may have a political slant.  I could care less! This is a free country, they are a publically traded compmany and can have any view thay they please.  I’m ticked that they say they can’t do anything about this.  YEAH RIGHT!  They have every once of control to de-list these super quality links that slant the search results for the search term failure.

Ok, enough of me complaining about my PR dropping.  Now for a list of why Google is the new evil and why you shouldn’t complain about Microsoft anymore:

  • Your Organic Search Engine Results only make a difference if you show up in Google. So you must optimize immensely…if not…
  • Adwords – The only way you will get business on the internet (because Google has a monopoly on search engine quality).  If you are not a profressor in using Adwords, you can almost be guaranteed that you will lose thousands of dollars
  • Adsense- You are an enslaved webmaster trying to make ends meet by optimizing for Adsense and at times you are stuck in the quagmire known as Adsense Arbitrage.  You Then rely on your Adsense revenue, which could be pulled out from under you at any time
  • Google Earth – Whoda thunk that 5 years ago you could be looking at a full-color potograph in complete detail of North Korea’s DMZ…or your front yard for that matter
  • GMAIL – OH! We just read your email in order to deliver relevant ads to you…no no no, we will never use your sensitive information, emails or conversations for any purpose.  We are the Good of Google…why would we do that?
  • YouTube (GOOTUBE) Yes, they failed at video so they bought YouTube…for 83 gazillion bazillion dollars.  Now your freeness to trade and share old video clips of You Can’t Do that On Television, Or the Guy Singing “Believe it Or Not” on Solid Gold is coming to an end.  You will be forced to watch videos with emplanted Google Video Ads, on a site peppered with Adwords and Optimized for Firefox.

So there you have it.  You are stuck with being worthless conducting business unless you are a slave to the G.  The new Goolopoy.  Hey! I’ve made a new buzz word!  Everyone talk about the Goolopoly…IF YOU DARE! MUHAHAHHA.

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